Sister Margo's Testimony
Someone who is not saved can never understand how valuable and important a saint’s testimony is to them. I earnestly pray that I always treasure mine. I’m not proud of the things in my past, but I want to share a bit of my story to encourage you that God will change you if you let Him. As you read, keep in mind that He performed all of these miracles in my life in a little over a year!
After 12 years of marriage, a little over a year and a half ago, my husband and I were on the threshold of divorce. After years of drowning myself in the day with my career and my evenings in vodka, our marriage was a mess. Now many people in the world today would tell you that after 12 years of marriage that we should be more than satisfied with having given matrimony our best shot. Most marriages today don’t last that long, right? Some of the phrases that kept playing over in my head during this time were, “You deserve more than this”, “You’d be better off on your own”, “If he really cared about you, he’d pay more attention to you.” Eventually, I believed those words I kept hearing and took action.
I had moved out of our house and had begun the cold business of mentally dividing things up and making plans financially, emotionally, and physically to be single. I rented an apartment.
Always priding myself on being independent and prepared, I thought that the state I was in was something that I had control over. Then God moved in my life. A dear friend, Sister Mandi, kept talking to me about God and about my soul. Not in a judgmental, condemning tone (and let me tell you that there was plenty to judge and condemn), but with sincere compassion. She shared her testimony with me and I had spent enough time with her to see that she had a genuine relationship with God. I used to tell my ‘friends’ about the unbelievable things that happened in her life. She shared that what happened for her could happen for me as well. Her testimony gave me a glimmer of hope that maybe it actually could happen for me.
My levels of doubt and skepticism were very high. Having been lied to so often in the world, had made me very hardened, but the way that I saw the saints of God living their lives was THE defining thing that opened my eyes to truth. Many times I had people tell me that I was living wrong when I could plainly see the wrong in their life, as well. I never wanted to be the hypocrite who was in the club on Saturday night and in church on Sunday. I would much prefer just to sleep in!
In the month or so before I went to the altar, my life fell utterly apart. People who I thought were so important in my life abandoned me…even family members. My husband and I were separated and I was completely alone. I’ve heard this time referred to as being “in the valley of decision”, but I felt like there really wasn’t any ‘decision” to make. I had no other option. There was no other choice. God had stripped me of just about everything that I had, people I trusted, relationships I depended on. I had nothing left to lose.
There were times (and I still believe this) that I could feel people praying for me. I could see the word of God working in my life: James 5:16 “….The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.”
When I went to the altar and repented, I can’t say that I got up KNOWING with out one doubt that my life was going to be different…that I was going to be different, but I felt so much better. Right away Jesus made it clear that He wanted me to start trusting in Him and He was so good to me! Yes, there have been many ugly things I’ve had to reap because there was so much ugliness I had sown, but at the same time I was being blessed in ways I had truly never imagined.
Right away, God took away my desire to drink! Gone! That miracle in my life made a strong impact on my husband. Neither one of us thought that I would ever stop drinking. Being saved only a short time and I already had a testimony that would affect someone else. A little over a month after I got saved so did my husband, Michael. This has been the most beautiful gift that the Lord has given me other than my own salvation. God was giving us all the tools and support we needed to start working on our marriage again. Many times when a situation appears hopeless is when God loves to rush in and prove to everyone that HE is their only hope.
We had other obstacles in our lives that we were going to have to trust God with. One great obstacle was that our physical home was in complete disarray. Actually, “disarray” does not give you an accurate description of the condition. The house that Michael and I owned together was to be remodeled. About 6 months into the remodeling, the contractor, my brother, walked out on the job in a despicable manner. Leaving our home, finances, and dreams of the future, completely gutted. I’ve heard that our lives were like the house…just a shell with nothing but destruction and ruin on the inside.
One evening Brother Jeremiah and Sister Mandi came over to assess if the condition of the house was as awful as we had described. Moments after their entry to the house and their quick evaluation of the wretched condition, Brother Jeremiah brought our need before the Lord in prayer. The four of us prayed in the middle of the broken boards, studs, and ceiling rafters. Being a new convert, I saw the situation as overwhelming and impossible. But there was tremendous faith in Brother Jeremiah’s prayer! Just a few short minutes after the prayer, Sister Mandi had an idea (divinely given), and made a phone call.
The person she called said he would come help restore our house! And he did! In a few weeks, our house was to the point that we could finish it ourselves with some dedicated saints, a lot of back-breaking work, and the help of God. Just as God healed the leper Naraam and gave him beautiful skin, our kind, heavenly Father didn’t just put a roof over our heads, but has blessed us with a beautiful home. The most amazing aspect is that He will do this for anyone. He finds joy in doing this for us. As is stated in Isaiah 61:3, “…to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness ”. He is SO GOOD! If things are getting difficult for you, like they had for us just remember Psalm 30:5 “…weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.”
Now that God had given us a strong marriage and a wonderful home, we wanted to begin adding to our family. After visiting with a group of 40 young boys in foster care at Christmas time, God put it in my heart to adopt a child and my husband is backing me up. We consulted our Pastor, Brother Carlos, and he counseled us on our marriage and parenting.
Michael and I had been through lots of counseling and therapy sessions with marriage counselors and psychologists and we never got anywhere. We would always end our counseling sessions more confused than when we started. As the “therapy” continued, the confusion grew more chaotic and frustrating. But the Lord rescued us from that, too. This is backed up in II Corinthians, “For God is not that author of confusion, but of peace.” Brother Carlos, being a true minister of God, cleared up issues in our marriage in one hour, that we had never even gotten to in worldly counseling. And never would have!
Now we’ve completed all of the paperwork, background screenings, home visits, and health requirements to foster and then adopt. It has been daunting, but again with God’s help, we are now all approved and just waiting. Pray for us that the child that God wants us to raise is brought to us. Part of me did not want to write this testimony until we had adopted because it would have been such a grand finale at the end, but you know what, when you’re in the light of God…it doesn’t end. If you continue walking in the light, your testimony will grow more beautiful every day.
If you are in the world and lost, don’t wait another second. Don’t wait to start living with and for God. I’ve partied in some of the best places, met famous people, traveled to exotic locations, had hundreds of ‘fun’ times, only to find out that it was all a lie. There’s nothing out in the world except misery, lies, deception, and hurt. I don’t care who you are or how ‘under control’ you think you have your life, it will end with your destruction. And, if you are a saint of God, protect your testimony. When I was in sin I watched my friend, Sister Mandi, and could find no flaw. Believe me, others are watching us. Your testimony could be the determining factor for someone else to seek salvation.
